not-so lamebook.

it's official. it's interresting how things reached this point today. i didn't go to school this morning on a count of utter fatigue (no sleep) combined a horrible cold that i have no time to have die this week. so i realized seeing as my film class would be a joke, i would skip it. did, had something assigned, no biggie. i had gotten all dolled and professionally dressed for a visit to my old high school (also known as the place that i worked at last year meaning staff, students, and judging eyes.). as i txtd my second mom (whom which i was going to hijack her life and be her company) she told me she was at a workshop.... as i was on the bus there. so i said screw it, took the bus to longueil metro while txting my contact list to try and make plans instead of very depressingly making my way to the boons less than an hour after my departure. finally, kaarlie was free so we met at dawson college, where i saw jillian, talked about her sex column in the plant, took two plant copies, ran into a couple of people (which is crazy seeing as i saw no one i knew when i actually WENT to that school), met kaarlie, and of course we headed to starbucks.

we got there, exchanged stories of our present circumstances, then spoke about new york once again and how we both wanted to go. conviniently, she had her mac tucked in her espresso -coloured case in her bag so using sbux's wifi, we not only booked our hostel (Jazz on the Park), calling work for the days off (yay horrible schedule for the next 3 weeks to get those days off!), followed by us going to get the bus tickets and FREAKING THE FUCK OUT!

isn't it gorgeous? she has her father's eyes.

after that, we talked about outtings there, what we would pack slash do during those total 15 hours travel time and got so bubbly and would end every sentence with "oh. and we are going to new york." SPEAKING OF OUTTINGS....

mhm. i know. i would want to be me, too. mission accomplished. kaarlz and i are going to get fakies to be able to get into the 21 and over show (and you know..... the bars, clubs, etc. BECAUSE IT'S NEW YORK!)

i suppose the countdown should begin!

i have been doing a lot of daily ramble these days and thought i would shake it up by posting a piece i wrote recently.

You're Left

i was told i have a vinegar face.

when all i want to do is weep.

but the drops fall from above my head and back.

i stop the moans to tell you to put your hand on my chest.

"you feel that?" i asked between the strums of my heart.

i knew by that look on your face that you couldn't answer yes.

i picked up the pieces of me you spread along the floor;

saying farewell out of politesse and patronism

for your inability to get it.

up i went through that street

soaking of stranger's cologne and leftovers.

something i never wished to be; what is left.

passing by the lantern-lit homes,

i the love-ridden woe

praying i played my cards right

even though i cheated the last hand.

stalled, i dosed off;

dreaming of who i should be smelling of.

wishing i was who they were thinking of.

but as the light seaped through,

that's when i knew

there could never be a you and me.

a you with me.

just me.

on a much happier note: i don't know if you've heard but.... i'm going to new york!

your new york goer,

mtb.